Sunday, November 6, 2016

Getting Back on Track

Hello blogger friends!  I have been away from my blog for awhile.  That is because I have been off track.  Things have been very busy and uncertain lately and I have just felt too physically tired and mentally exhausted to sit down and write a post.  I don't like being this way but I know that sometimes life just gets hectic and I have to lay low and rest. Some of the issues I am feeling anxious and uncertain about are listed below: (Hope you don't mind me venting -- feel free to scan through - lol!)  

At Work - I work at a nonprofit in the grant writing, fundraising department.  The two women I work with - the Director who is my boss, and the Associate Director are both leaving - one is already gone and the other is retiring in a month.  So that leaves just me!  They haven't hired anyone to take their place yet.  This has brought a lot of extra work for me and creates a feeling of uncertainty about who my new boss will be and what the future of our department will look like  This makes me feel anxious.  I was hired to work part time, 3 days a week.  I have agreed to work 4 days a week until new people are hired and in place.  Because I am doing a portion of their jobs and having to learn about each of their jobs, I am exhausted at the end of the day.  I have a good work ethic and I will do what needs to be done to the best of my ability, but this is a stressful situation to say the least.   I love my job and I love what I do but I am at a point in my life where I want to work part time with low stress after having a 35 year career in a stressful human resources position so the increased hours, workload and uncertainty are wearing me out! Fortunately, when they hired me they knew this so the executive director keeps telling me it will be fine.  In the meantime, I am trying to rest, exercise, eat well and try to manage my anxiety about the unknown.

Medical Insurance -  I am on the Health Exchange - or Obamacare.  It is a VERY flawed system, but I have been able to make it work by having a high deductible ($6k), basic plan.  It is really just a catastrophic plan.  Fortunately, I don't have chronic issues to deal with so I am not tied to any certain providers.  For 2017 Blue Cross dropped out of the marketplace so I am having to choose another provider and the premiums have doubled.  The only two carriers left in my local exchange are very different than Blue Cross so I am having to figure out which will be best for me now that I no longer have Blue Cross.   That deadline is looming and it is all very confusing trying to decipher the plan options.

Housing - I own my home on my own.  It is an older home and needs constant maintenance.  Luckily, I have a great handyman BUT maintenance still costs money.  I am weighing options on whether to sell and get a townhouse with a maintenance fee or just pay to have things done at my home here.  There are some things I need to get done whether I stay or sell so I am researching and comparing costs.

These are all issues that most people deal with and I am certainly not writing this to insinuate that my "problems" are bad.  I KNOW that I am very blessed and fortunate to have my life.  I live very frugally and on very little money.  I have no debt and I am very independent.  However, as all of us have to do - I am evaluating my choices about work, insurance and housing as life moves forward and things change.  It isn't a BAD thing -- it is simply life.  Right now, I feel tired from it all but I still feel joy knowing I have choices and it will all work out!

Radnor Lake - My sanctuary
Meanwhile - one of the ways I deal with stressful times in my life is by getting out in nature.  In Nashville, we are lucky to have a treasure called Radnor Lake State Natural Area.  It is a beautiful lake surrounded by miles of hiking trails.  It is a natural area rather than a park so there are no picnic tables, playgrounds, etc.  It is rustic and unspoiled.  There are bald eagles, otters, owls, many different species of ducks, deer and wild turkey who call it home. We call it the Southern Walden Pond! It is very close to my house so I go there often. I can hike 3-4 miles in those hilly woods and talk to God about everything going on in my life and He ALWAYS puts it into perspective for me.  The natural rhythms of the earth, the woods, the trees and the wildlife remind me to stop and enjoy the present and let God's holy spirit guide my life and my choices.  When I walk in those woods, the anxiety falls away and I am one with the Creator and His creation.  

As you can guess, I am a HUGE proponent and advocate for wild places and green spaces as I believe they are a balm to the soul.  I take my granddaughter out in the woods as much as possible.  We love to explore and find all of the treasures of nature - acorns, moss, autumn leaves, and beautiful rocks. Everything is amazing and exciting to her and that helps bring out the child in me as well.  


Nana and E at Radnor Lake


I am hopeful that things will fall into place over the next few months at work and in other areas and I will feel more inspired to write posts. Meanwhile - I love reading other folks' blogs and posts and will continue to stay connected in that way!  

How do you get back on track when life gets hectic and you are faced with challenges?  

Thanks for listening to my venting!  

A bridge over the creek at Radnor Lake Natural Area


“Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop away from you like the leaves of Autumn.” 
― John Muir, Our National Parks